Happy New Year MDC’s !!!
(Moms Dad’s and Caregivers)
This post is dedicated to all parents. Let’s talk about parental fear. Your child comes with a face that only you know means trouble, fear or the worse. You are tallying in your head the worst scenarios and you are calculating the measure of disaster that is about to unfold in front of you. You knew this moment was coming! Your heart is racing, you breathe shortens quickly….. Ah yes here it comes… the news you’ve been dreading ….. the moment when your biggest parental fears are about to come true…and then…. they don’t. You’re seeing/believing what you perceive to be a fear, but what if I told you that everything you’re seeing is not that big or scary? Without stepping into the rabbit hole of perception it is true that as parents we have a vision in which we see ourselves in our kids. We are afraid failing our kids and seeing them fail. Breathe.
In fear of failure we decide to give them the tools so they can continue to build the tower of success that we once started. Surprise! It’s not your tower anymore. Its theirs. While we are providing them the tools to grow their tower, we also pass on our fears. We don’t mean to, but we do. We think we know what is good for them and what is not. I’m certain that when you grew up your parents told you what you need to do to be successful or not. Maybe even put you on the same path that they were on once. This is what previous generations did as parents. As the old saying goes… “Times have changed” But isn’t time a changing agent? So what then? Be fearful of time? Look around you, seriously tell me is everything the same as it was 10,20 or 30 years ago? It’s not. It all has changed and will continue to change. As much as we want to use our formulas to be successful the “game” changes. Life is always changing and evolving. It’s not to say that there is good knowledge from the past. What I am saying is open you mind to the possibilities.
So how am I suppose to live? I have been asked this before. The answer is: Continue to learn. As a caregiver/parent you parenting never goes away. It simply changes form thru out your childs life. (I will be writing on this subject next week.) I want the best outcomes for you and your child. But look around you, try to think in the present times. The past you knew does not exist anymore. See you guys next week.
Warm regards.
Mario
Trans Parent 